The Folly of Planning

THE FOLLY OF PLANNING

Recently when talking about my travel plans to several different people I concluded with, “But who the fuck knows what will happen?”

I finally listened to myself, “who the fuck knows …”

And, those words rattled around in my brain. Nagging me.

I began to think, “Well if no one knows what’s coming. Why not just proceed AS IF. As if it were going to come to be. Why not just assume I could do it. Would do it. Will do it. In spite of the perceived risks.”

I plan to travel to the Canadian Rockies to celebrate my birthday.

But,what if Alberta experiences a fourth wave of COVID infections?

Shouldn’t be a problem because the experts tell me that my vaccination with Pfizer then Moderna protects me from the evil Delta Variant. Besides I plan to be the only person wearing a mask in public gatherings in the mountain town of Canmore. And, I can avoid crowds. My last time in Canmore I was awake and walking around long before anyone else. I just had to dodge the twenty-something males riding fat bikes on the designated-for-walking trail. And, I still wash my hands like twenty times a day.

But, what if I experience a ‘breakthrough’ infection?

I’m sorry. But I can’t live my life being scared of possible (read remote) happenings. Besides I have told my children “if I die while travelling, I died happy.” I am not afraid of death. Now, how I might die is another matter.

I think about contingencies. I think about what I could do, can do. And, then it is, as they say, it is in God’s Hands. As the old Yiddish Proverb says, “Man plans. God laughs.”

I am weary of living my life in fear. Of not going anywhere.

I am an explorer. I want to, no, need to explore. And, if that exploration leads to death – so be it!

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