It is 5:15 a.m. at Melia Panama Canal and the Howler Monkeys have just started their serenade. They howl most days. Especially in the morning. Starting at fiveish or sixish. Often at night. But the Howlers have been mostly silent these last few days. It is Carnival in Panama. And, on Sunday dozens of mostly…
MEANING TOO Meaning is as Meaning does. It becomes. It grows. It evokes. Like the pain that behind it is. It flourishes in the corners of the mind like a dark flower at midnight, like a wee seed growing, ever growing into possibilities. It becomes germane like a crystal ever forming. One small grain that…
MEANING Meaning is as Meaning does. Purpose is as Purpose does. Or, does Meaning direct Purpose, Or, does Purpose direct Meaning or are they enshrined in a Moebius Strip, ever one leading to the other and back again. I know not. I just know that one can not exist without the other. Existence makes purpose,…
THE MONSTER She crushes me in her voluminous tentacles squeezing, squeezing, squeezing, the very life out of me. But, wait she is not done. She dallies, teasing me with brief surcease but again she resumes her specialty. To create unending, eternal, horrific, undeniable, pain. Her gift if you can call it that, is to not…
C.A.R. — The Finale I sit up in the bath. I pull back the shower curtain that has been cocooning me in my bath. I twist the drain control and the water quickly starts draining out of the tub. I place my right hand on the bottom of the tub, slightly behind me. I rotate…
The pain is with me. Again. She is my unconstant companion. She goes. She comes. To flirt. Crushing me in her embrace. The kind of embrace that leaves one waiting for surcease. Any way out. The lake calls. Loudly. Softly. He whispers, “Come. Come to me. I can promise you relief from all that pain….
I FLUNKED SUICIDE, NOW WHAT? Waiting in the wings of life I pause, Consider briefly The meaning, and the answers awaiting. Take a step, then two, then three, as I stumble out upon the Stage that is Life. Toward some unknown unknowing, shimmering dream to be made real but only if I follow the Path…
CAR IS READY It was Wednesday, November third twenty ten. I had hobbled down the stairs from my third floor apartment, grasping the rail in my left hand, and carrying my cane in my right hand. The HandiBus was just pulling in front of the apartment. Fortunately I had left enough time to make it…
Memory can be false. I always remembered the quote as “music can soothe the savage beast.” William Cosgreve, English poet and playwright, actually said, “Music hath charms to soothe a savage breast, to soften rocks, or bend a knotted oak.”
Our waiter looked significantly at us. In a slight Spanish accent he said, “this is Ignacio your Wine Steward. He will be helping you choose your wine this evening.” We were celebrating my seventy first birthday at Tramanto at Vidanta’s Riviera Maya resort. Tramanto is open only in the evening and only from Thursday to…
